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Archive for July, 2011

So finally I am out of my diarrhea phase. Good part about is I learnt how to write DIARRHEA 😆 . It’s been raining cats and dogs in Mumbai for the last three days and I am under house arrest. But that’s ok, what matters is I am feeling fine and refreshed.

So this morning I was passing dark green coloured stool, which had me pretty scared for a while, but Dr Kamran says it’s a part of ileostomy.  I’ve got no other updates apart from I miss my kid so badly. He hardly speaks to me these days, I know he’s just 3.7 he has no clue what’s his father undergoing.

I got one more surgery on 6th probably which will put an end to my colostomy woes, but days pass soooooooooooooo slowly ! So slow ! Arghhhhh ! i hate this !

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What have I done?? Just when I was tad bit ok and recovering, I binge on a bowl of Shell Fish, and as a price for my idiocy have been suffering since two days. Dr Kamran told Aunty Shirley that I can eat ‘anything’ including fish. So she has cooked some awesome shell Fish and I happened to lose control and eat a ‘little more’ .. result sleepless days and night !! finally visited the local GP and now I am feeling better

So something funny happened today ! I was reading tweets of one of my friends who had posted this picture. And i was kinda taken back because it said A cancer patients chances are just 60%.  I told my friend that it was OK, life is uncertain anyways, no one knows when ‘it’s time’.

But then I just broke down, I was crying bitterly, a moment that ‘lacked faith’ was hurting real bad. I have no idea about my chances, neither I am going to worry about it, because I stand on His word and it say ‘Be still, and Know that I AM GOD’

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So hey ! Me again,

Sorry for not updating the site for 5 days, In fact I totally forgot about this place untill i was surprised by the tears that were rolling down the cheek without my knowledge, Not the first time though … but i guess that’s ok. Men cry at night (and blog afterwards) !

So here’s what happened in that 6 days, I got discharged from Joy hospital last Monday (i guess, i have lost track of days and weeks), So as it was one big technical error and I was supposed to be out by 12PM , turns out so just because of one call I was held back till 8.30PM , last-minute oozing of wounds, colostomy bag changes etc and finally we were back in Airoli at 9pm

Next 3 days were really miserable, crunching stomach pain, followed by diarrhoea.  So for three days I was literally gasping for air, whilst getting upset at any one who called to check my well-being because I could barely gather strength to speak. Except for my wife I had to put up a brilliant ‘Hey Honey, I’m fine” show, but eventually she found out that I was suffering.

So, after the third day, i regained my ‘desire’ to eat food, and been slowly getting back to normal. I have had issues with

That's not me !

the leaking colostomy bag, but Sairith and Shirley Aunty have been there for me every step of the way. Even Godwin Uncle who was sick himself took care of me. So how do I ever give them back?? I pray to God to show me how.

In other news, tomorrow my stitches will be removed, am I scared? yeah a bit.. but that’s ok, I will live with that. Meanwhile I have gotten used to the colostomy bag, it leaks at times, then it’s not the end of the world. Every damn problem has a solution.. this shall pass  too .  Best part is I don’t have to wash my ass 😆 for now that is. Oh just in case you didn’t know what is colostomy is..  my ass is officially in my stomach now. wait.. let me post a picture for you ! You think it’s gross? I thought for a while, but now I am totally cool with it. Shit happens .. So what??

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So since the third day all went downhill, I happenD to eat some semi solids at night and had a bad bout of diarrhea. It lasted for two days. I did not get any sleep due to that, so was totally exhausted, to add misery my colostomy bag leaked on 3rd day. So 3 consecutive nights of not having sleep took its toll on my body.

Got discharged from the hospital on day 6 after bit of a drama with the insurance company, had I listened to my wife it would have been much easier 😛 . Damn!! She’s never wrong .

So here am I having survived 8 days of surgery, getting well bit by bit.. Night time sleep is the only problem, acid reflux is s biatch I tell you!!

Oh yesterday I broke down and asked Shirley Aunty to lay her hands on me and pray.. To tell you the truth, I’ve been feeling lot better since. Must find my spiritual roots… Because I know prayer heals faster.

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Prayer Heals

So hey! I’m back, writing this from my cellphone. Today is the 3rd day since my surgery,I’ve been recovering well. Although it hurts like hell at times,but thanks to the invention of pain killers.

So on 12th I was taken for surgery at 3pm, after administering epidural(which took a long time and making me groan in dizziness). Next thing I remember screaming ” awww my stomach hurts, please make it go away” I guess it was at the ICU. Anyways I was shifted back to my room at 8pm to my waiting loved ones.

12th was quite painful, 13th was better and today is blessed, I am able to move around.most of my pipes have been taken off couple more to go,Dr Kamran said by Monday I should be discharged.

Meanwhile a bomb blast took
place next to saifee hospital where PM of India, and Sonia Gandhi are about to visit, it would have been damn difficult had I been got operated at Saifee. God makes way you see! One more instance to prove that God goes ahead of His people if they earnestly ask for it!

Oh btw remember my “fight” with God when I was undergoing radiation? Dr Kamran said my tumour had almost vanished!!

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So finally couple of days ago I underwent another blood test. I’ve been pretty depressed since my wife and kid moved back to Kuwait, so finally when I got the test result I was pouring out, I’m not sure if they were tears of joy or fear, but I happened scare Aunty and Sairith. Called up the doctor and I was told to get admitted on 11th so that surgery could take place tomorrow.

So here I am,lying on the bed, undergoing all preperation. Am I scared? Hell no!! I have never been this positive all my life. I just want to get well and hold my son and hug him and want to tell him that indont ever want to miss even a day till he gets tired of me.

I asked my wife not to come for the surgery, I know she’s undergoing tremendous pressure right now, but then she’s a bold woman! I know she will get through these difficult times through prayers.

Btw, I know God has a purpose for me, tomorrow I will be born agin. On news years day Pastor Jerry had given a prophecy “behold I give you a new thing” . I guess the thing is the new life I will recieve tomorrow, and I pray to God that it will be for His glory.

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OK this is a real short post .. because I am really PISSSED at myself !!

Blood test failed ..

WBC low,

RBC Low

Haemoglobin Low 

To Sum it up = #FML

Got another test on saturday .. hogging like a pig to get my blood report normal

Not given up on hope

Because Hope is all that is left now !

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So here’s what happened..

June 29: 10am : Reached Joy Hospital, after a small argument with the security lady who wasn’t allowing our son with us, finally Hospital owner Dr Roy Patankar intervenes and we are allowed to go to our room.

11.Am : I am told ro drink barium to undergo CT scan, meanwhile blood is taken for test.

1.00 PM : My Surgeon Dr Kamran Khan visits and does a ‘analyzation’ … he’s pretty happy that I am in Good shape.

3.30 PM: After such a long wait, finally CT scan is happening, But highly disorganized  one, the dude who was pouring liquid in to my anus spills it all over my pant and I am pretty uncomfortable already !

4.00 PM : ah ! Lunch finally !!

6.00 PM : Yuckky tasting Laxative is here, I am asked to drink it over the next 3 hours, torture I tell you, It tastes like Piss.. but I am done with it by 9.

Meanwhile I am asking the nurse to remove the IV needle, they say let it be for the surgery which will take place TOMORROW !!!!

9.00 PM : My running in and out of the toilet like mad, laxatives already taking effect.

10.00 PM: RMO visits and says ‘SURGERY CANCELLED BECAUSE YOUR WBC IS LOW’ and we can take risk with low immunity during major surgery’…. WTF !!!!! WTF !!!! WTF !!!

11.00 PM : My wife who endured it all the day (my son was with her aunt during this time) finally agrees to go to her aunts house as Hospital wouldn’t discharge me because the ‘billing’ dept is closed.

11.45 PM : Sairith is here with dinner, he’s staying overnight at the hospital.

So finally on 30th June, at 10 am I exit the hospital after Mr Avinash said We didn’t have to pay anything and he will take care of it with my Insurance company..

Meanwhile Dr Kamran kinda says sorry for the mess, clearly he should have done his homework better, He should have done blood test days before the surgery.

Now the situation is like this, Wife has few more days left in her annual leave, knowing that she’s an workaholic, I asked her to go back to Kuwait with Jayden, after all there is no guarantee that my WBC will go up on 5th.

So here I am, depressed (again). I hate it when things don’t go my way, that’s my weakness. If I want something (or anything) I WANT IT NOW !! NOW !! NOW!!!.

So, I will be spending next few days here in Mumbai, probably watching movies.

Oh ! btw yesterday we went to ‘Transformers 3’ with Jayden.. What a terrible movie to watch with family.. Totally Mindless!

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