Malignant Tumour and Bombay Rains

So we landed in Mumbai couple of days back, after a long trip. Tiresome yet loved the moments we spent together. Once we are in India, we did contact Dr Kamran asking about updates, turns out that finally Joy hospital has agreed to take the guarantee certificate from Insurance company and My surgery will be done at Joy Hospital Chembur. It really had me worried as Saifee is totally opposite side of town and travel will take 3 hours during normal hours, I was worried that Bombay Rains which are notorious for flooding etc would cause trouble. But God is at work, it’s pretty evident now.

So am I worried about the big day? I was for a while, but then who needs to worry about major sickness when there is so much family politics? Did visit the ‘vile person’ for formality sake, I put up a brilliant acting that I was sick and weak. Apparently she believed it, and we left without having dinner, because she didn’t offer. People I tell you. Like the song says  ‘People = Shit’

In other news, Mom and Dad who had planned a visit to Bombay against my wish have finally backed down. I am relieved actually, they were visiting because they were under pressure from family members. Now I’m glad that they are not coming,  they would have made more mess of my complex family political situation.

That’s it.. I am enjoying Bombay rains and counting hours for the surgery.. Who’d have thought a 4 cm tumour would alter life 😆

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Mindgames … to be continued

I’m totally pissed ! I can’t believe the mindgames people play even when I am suffering, depressed and staring at death. Suddenly people who have ‘discarded’ you want to be your closest pals because ‘world is watching them’.  I am worried that they will go to any extent to bring us harm, I know they are capable of. At present I am not  thinking of  surgery, not even a bit, but worried about how my wife will put up with these evil people when I am down.

btw.. I am flying back to India tonight. Got my CT scan tomorrow. Really hoping for the best, My will to survive is stronger than ever before, thanks to the sick minded people around us.

Sorry about the post.. I am depressed.

More from India .. tomorrow !

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Countdown to Surgery !

So the countdown has begun, 9 more days to Surgery. Worried at times, then not worried most of the times. Since it’s been said “Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?’  So I am just leaving my worries at the feet of My God as an offering and asking him to give life in return. ‘HE’s a good father, I know he won’t say no.

In other news, Celebrated my wife’s birthday at  Zaffran after a cooking disaster that happened at lunch. Poor thing, She’s been taking lot of stress lately, I just can’t help her, she has to overcome it by herself, But I know she will.

Missing the Rolling Stone India Metal Awards today, Originally our vacation was planned for this occasion, but like they say ‘Life is what Happens to you when you are busy making other plans’ . So what is it? Man shall not plan? At present I have no plans, NO PLANS ! can you imagine a person who has no plans for life? What good it is to make plans if the God isn’t approving them? Like Proverb 16:3 says ‘Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed’.

So tomorrow it will be 2 months since I stopped working, kinda  feels sad, this is probably the longest break from work since 1995. But then again, somehow not worried, also baffled at my co-workers who totally lack courtesy to give me a call. Damn! I must be a  terrible person.

Nothing else for now, will update if something pops up! Meanwhile .. Keep the faith.

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Making peace with God

So all is well in cancer town, I guess I am recovering well from Radiation. Although my skin has darkened a bit too much around the waist guess I can live with that. Meanwhile I did undergo a blood test to see if there are any damages to my vital organs. Luckily none, blood test has come as a positive sign that I am still the superhuman that I used to be 😛

Meanwhile, wife doesn’t want me to attend work because she’s afraid that I will catch infection since I work in a public place and she’s right, although I was upset for a day or two, then I’d rather be jobless than be at work and catch infection (and hear from her)

Having best time with my kid, although I am having difficulty getting off the social networks and devout time to my kid. Must change , must change.

Meanwhile the vile person has been in attacking mode again, actually she’s always been at it, just that I wasn’t told about it. Anyway’s I leave her to God.

Talking about God, there is a huge conflict in my mind, it’s a war actually. I was at the prayer meeting the other day, But I am still not made my peace with cancer.. I keep asking God .. How could you let this happen? But then I know the answer which I am not ready to accept.

Anyway’s one thing for sure.. if faith won’t get me through with this … nothing else will !

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It’s only words and words are all I have …

So there was I standing in the Kitchen informing my sister that I reached Kuwait safe and sound, and when I turned around, he stood there near the door rubbing his eyes in disbelief that his father was indeed home. Although he was at the airport to receive me he was fast asleep, then he charged towards me, hugged me so tight,  I have no words to explain, i guess I have never felt this emotion since I first held him when he was out of the incubator after spending 5 days. And then he asked ‘Dada, your booboo finished?’ . I said ‘No Darling, it’s only a while, Everything is going to be all right‘

So I arrived in Kuwait yesterday from Mangalore after meeting ‘the most’ dysfunctional family on planet earth. Don’t you hate it when your own people fake sympathy or even try to scare you? or give you hints how the property should be divided. Sick people, but that’s where I come from, No regrets ! I was Destined to suffer I guess.

So the surgery date has been fixed, June 28th is the day ! I will be operated in one of the best hospitals in South Mumbai. Since Joy hospital is acting like a biatch with the insurance company, I have decided to get operated at the Saifee hospital in South Mumbai. Although its opposite side of town and commuting will hell of a challenge in the Mumbai rains, We have no option but go ahead with it. Hope God holds back rain by a little during this time, just like 2002 July when I got married and rain gods were kind enough to us that it didn’t rain most of the times we went out.

Meanwhile, waiting for a blood test this Monday, gotta check my WBC count, if everything is normal will be joining work for just 10 days. God I hate to sit at home and not earning my daily bread !

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Colorectal cancer and Rock n’ Roll !

Sincere apologies for not updating the blog.

So this is what happened. Friday I got a call saying that My radiation got cancelled because of machine failure, Boy o’ Boy ! I was so heart broken. I was about to pack my bags and go to Mangalore, my home town and come back on Monday morning. But then Sairith and My Siter told me to not to go. God bless him. In the evening the hospital called they asked me if I could come NOW. I was so glad as if some one was calling me for a massage session.

On Saturday morning I had my 24th radiation session, then I had nothing to do till Monday morning, So you know what I did? Herman Li from Metal band DraganForce was in town for a guitar clinic. So At 3.00pm me, sairith and couple of his friends took a cab to the other side of town. BIG MISTAKE. On the way it was pouring so bad, so bad at one point I thought, Cab was going to drown 😛 , anyways by the time we reached the venue the rain had stopped and met lot of local rock stars and saw Herman Li as well. Sairith was grinning ear to ear to get autograph and photo op with his idol. Finally Herman Li decided to ‘fake’ some guitar solos. Crowd was fanatic probably didn’t notice that he was faking it.

Then the horrible wait for the Taxi, boy I called the taxi at 6pm but due to rain he came to pick us only by 8PM and charged a bomb as well. But anyways I was home by 9 exhausted, but up on my feet the very next day

Sunday was boring, Monday was my last radiation, I met Dr Manish who was pretty happy to see that My body had taken the radiation onslaught well, He wished me well and I said goodbye to Jupiter Hospital

So Today I met Dr Kamran Khan, My surgeon at S.L Raheja Hospital in Mahim. He was glad that i was in good shape, so he said the surgery will take place by the end of the month but I will have to carry the poop bag for 2months. Damn! as much as i hate it but I am thankful to God and I am ready to go through the process,

So here I am, done with my radiation, packing my bags to go back to my wife and Kid, but before that got some financial things to take care in Mangalore. So tomorrow I am heading to Mangalore (hope it isn’t raining) and the day after to Kuwait.

Will update from Mangalore.. until then Ciao !

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A Matter of Life and Death

I’ve been thinking … thinking…. thinking. Is this how I am going to die? (although I have always wished to die an instant death) Then as I lay down on the radiation machine my mind had a quick flash back…

Age 5: Taken by a flash flood, almost swept in to the raging  canal, but I survived

Age 7 : Herpes around my genitals, was very ill, but I survived

Age 9 (or 10?):  Fell of a tree only to get stuck at a lower branch and survived

Age 14 : Major Bicycle accident, friend of mine broke two legs and two hands, I survived with a broken pinky

Age 14: Rock climbing, got stuck half the way, would have fallen to death, Survived again

Age 28: Major low Blood Pressure episode.. Survived

Age 37 : Diagnosed with Colorectal cancer …  MUST SURVIVE ! MUST !!

Because This NOT how I wish to Die !!

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What’s causing cancer?

So I have been thinking last night, what must have caused the cancer? I have been suspecting a drainage pipe inside our showroom (back store) which is covered by some kind of aluminium paper. I faintly remember one of the mall technician telling me to cover the pipe because it could cause damage to skin. That was 8 years ago, so my mind start to wonder, could the pipe be made of asbestos and I have been inhaling asbestos for the last 8 years??

Well today there is more bad news, according to ‘certain report‘ which is published on Al Watan newspaper Water and Air in Kuwait could cause Cancer.   Also I stumbled up on this another article which proves that something is seriously wrong. Well I am not qualified to judge on hearsay but something is wrong definitely  at the place I work, First one of my colleague fell seriously sick due to some thyroid problem, he almost died (due to negligence, and has been neglecting it since his recovery) then another of my colleague had tumours removed from her breast (which she says hereditary) and I have been diagnosed with stage 1 colorectal cancer. This is really worrisome, I mean what if it is true and we all are contaminated? For many years we used to drink bottled water because we thought tap water was unsafe, now looks like everything is contaminated with bromide.

If water and air is causing cancer in Kuwait …. God help us.

But then this all could be wrong, one of those conspiracy theories by the American Companies

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